Wednesday, May 27, 2009

This is hard.

I am definitely not cut out to be a working mom. It's all I can do to focus during the day and get stuff done...I miss my little boy SO much! Today was worse than yesterday and even though I tried to keep myself busy by starting to pack up my classroom while my kids were working, there just wasn't enough to do!

One of my co-workers asked me today if I was going to miss teaching...I will miss it. A lot, actually! But there is nothing in the world worth more to me than being there for Will. My mom used to tell me that she told my dad she'd "eat beans out of a can for the rest of her life" as long as she could stay home with my brother and me. And I can totally relate now. I'd live in an apartment, with no cable, and eat bean burritos forever as long as I could be with him during the day. I'm so, so thankful I only have six more days of school left. Because it seems like I've been working for two weeks, not just two days.

I think it's been hard on Will too...not just me. My aunt told me that he slept all day today, which isn't really like him. He's sleeping on me right now too and hasn't really woken up since I got home at 4. I'm trying hard not to worry about him (easier said than done!) and keep telling myself that this is an adjustment for him too...he needs his Mommy as much as I need him! He cried this morning when I left, which made me feel awful. I know he doesn't know that I'm leaving him, but the timing worked out just to where he started crying when I gave him a kiss and told him goodbye. It broke my heart! I'm so thankful my aunt is staying with him - I would be a MESS if I didn't love and trust the person taking care of him!

Tomorrow is Thursday, thank goodness...2 more days until the weekend!

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